Christmas in My Neighborhood

I live east of Yuma, Arizona in an area known as The Foothills. My neighborhood is called Arroyo de Fortuna, which is the Spanish name for the Fortuna Wash which lies just east of our subdivision. There are 123 homes and our demographics include a couple families with young children, a few middle-age working people and the rest are retirees. Most are in their 60's and 70's and a few are in their 80's or 90's. As far as I know, I am the only one with Parkinson's disease. I would say about 25% stay year round and the rest only come here for the Winter (four to six months). Quite a few are from Canada and the rest come from the Pacific Northwest with an occasional mid-westerner thrown in for good measure. 

When it comes to Holiday decorating, it's an interesting mix. It seems like the Canadians tend to do the most, maybe it's because they enjoy being able to put the Christmas decorations up without having to trudge through snow. The ones who go back North to visit family for Christmas tend to do the least. Almost everyone has something, even if it's just a Poinsettia in a pot or a wreath on their front door.

Poinsettia in a pot

You've got the ones who decorate the cactus. 

The ones who put out the lighted snowmen and Santa.

  


The ones who have a sense of humor.

The minimalists.

The creative ones.

Snowman made from Tumbleweeds

And my favorite, a fellow who lives here year round puts out this one every year.

His next door neighbor happens to live in North Pole, Alaska during the Summer.

As I walked through the neighborhood this Christmas morning, I waved and said Merry Christmas to everyone. And a special Merry Christmas to all of you!

A Parky Christmas Wish

'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through my home,
This Parky was stumbling around in the dark, alone;
The stockings were hung by the chimney askew,

Because that’s the best this Parky could do.

The children were sleeping, I heard sniffles and sniffs,

As I was struggling, to wrap their Christmas gifts;
And hubby was sound asleep, I could hear him snore,
As my foot cramps made me, hobble across the floor.

When out in the kitchen there arose such a clatter,
As I dropped and broke the big turkey platter.
I tried to pick up the pieces, to put in the trash,
And ended up giving myself a nasty old gash.

I tried to bandage my hand, to stop the blood flow,
But it was difficult, because I move so slow,
As I was trying, I felt a sensation,
Was someone else here, or just another hallucination?

Over by the chimney, carrying a walking stick,
Stood a man who looked very much like St. Nick.
Was I dreaming, was I awake, had I gone insane?
I wasn't sure, then he called all my symptoms by name;

"Now, TREMORS! now, FALLING! now, INSOMNIA and STIFFNESS!
Now, FOOT CRAMPS! Now DROOLING! Now, MASKING and SLOWNESS!
To the top of the porch! To the front lawn!
I am telling you, symptoms, from this girl be gone"

As a dust storm caused the leaves to fly,
I watched as my symptoms disappeared in the sky,
So up to the heavens my symptoms they flew,
And I knew I would have a good Christmas, too.  

Before I knew it, he had turned and fled,
And I, quite dazed, went back to bed.
But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,
"Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"

You can find all my videos on my YouTube channel:

https://www.youtube.com/user/ParkinsonsHumor

Dinner with the neighbors on Christmas Day

In everyone's life, there are certain dates on a calendar that make you smile because they remind you of happy events and there are dates that make you sad because they remind you of very bad events. I have many happy dates and only three bad ones. The worst of my bad dates is December 24th and it can't be ignored because it's the day before Christmas.  It doesn't matter what happened on this date, it's just the prologue of this story.

Phil, the Ham carver

My Wonderful Husband has similar feelings at Christmas and that's why we don't decorate or buy each other presents. We usually have a big plate of pasta and stay by ourselves. For the last two years, our very nice neighbors (Phil & Ruth) have invited us for Christmas dinner and we've said no. They invited us again this year and we said yes, because we didn't want to hurt their feelings.  

It was a small gathering, just nine, Phil & Ruth, Shirley & Jerry (Ruth's sister & brother-in-law), George & Freida (my walking partners), Erv (another neighbor) and us. It was a planned potluck and each brought their specialty. We had ham, scalloped potatoes, corn pudding, 
deviled eggs, Hawaiian sweet potatoes, three kinds of dessert and a nice bottle of blackberry wine.   

My famous deviled eggs

We only had one mishap, a glass of wine got knocked over as we finished saying grace. I guess we should have included not spilling anything in our blessing and I was thankful that it wasn't me who did the knocking over. In fact, I didn't drop or spill anything and no one complained when I ate most of my meal with my fingers, since I was having trouble with a fork.   

It was a feast and after dinner, we sat around and talked and laughed about all kinds of things until we had room for dessert. Shirley told us about her neighbor who cooked really strange things and always wanted her to try them, Erv told us about growing up on a farm and I even sang a little bit of one of my funny songs. All in all, it was a very enjoyable day and I thank Phil and Ruth for inviting us.  

And a special thanks for sending home some leftovers with us, we gobbled them up the next day.

Thank you for reading this story, I hope you enjoyed it. This is just one of a hundred stories in my book, Parkinson's Humor - Funny Stories about My Life with Parkinson's Disease. Please consider purchasing a copy from Amazon.com or your favorite online book seller. Thank you and have a Happy Parkie Day!

The Seven Dwarfs come for Christmas

Clicking on any picture will enlarge it

This is our Christmas Tree, it's about 10 inches high and was made by a dear friend many years ago when we lived in a RV.  She died soon after and we put it out each year as a tribute to her.  It is the only sign of Christmas in our home and there will be no presents under it.  We buy each other gifts whenever we feel like it but never for Christmas and we never put cookies out for Santa.

So, it was a big surprise when we woke up on Christmas morning and found some of the Seven Dwarfs and a few of their cousins had taken up residence.  They were as follows:  Grumpy, Dopey, Sleepy and Sneezy and they brought along: Coughy, Achy and Sniffley.  Yup, you guessed it, my Wonderful Husband woke up with a bad Cold and by the time the day was over, I had it too.  We like to do EVERYTHING together.

Colds do not agree with Wonderful Husbands or Parkies.  We do not find anything humorous about them.  Colds make all Husbands miserable and tend to aggravate the symptoms of people with Parkinson's Disease, since the virus stresses our immune systems.  I don't know how a Husband with Parkinson's Disease would be with a Cold, but I don't want to find out.

Later in the day, another Dwarf showed up at the door.  His name was Fevery and we did our best to keep him out, but he got in anyway.  We both really hate that one! 

Parkinson's medicines come with a huge list of "Do not take with blah, blah, blah" so finding a cold medicine for a Parkie ain't easy.  I tend to use Moomer's tried and true remedy, rub Vicks VapoRub on my chest, put on an old t-shirt and go to bed.  




Dats juss wha dis Pawkie is gone do  
Translation:  That's just what this Parkie is going to do, it's hard to talk proper when you have a cold.

Funny thing about all of this, both of our noses are now just as red as Rudolph's! 

If you see Snow White, please tell her to come get her Dwarfs!


Thank you for reading this story, I hope you enjoyed it. This is just one of a hundred stories in my book, Parkinson's Humor - Funny Stories about My Life with Parkinson's Disease. Please consider purchasing a copy from Amazon.com or your favorite online book seller. Thank you and have a Happy Parkie Day!

Christmas Eve in Yuma, Arizona

  

click on pic to enlarge

Since we live in the desert and close to Mexico, people tend to do Christmas a little differently around here.  Tamales are a favorite Christmas food and this is an agave Christmas Tree.  Agave's are a cactus that gets a huge flower spike.  The dead spikes are treasured as decorations.  Below are some pictures of the agave plant and blooms.
                                          
                                                                                  

Close up of blooms

That's me standing in there   

Dead spike next to a car

As you can see, they are quite large and the plant expends so much energy producing the bloom, that the plant dies afterwards.  It is common to see lights strung on cactus and palm trees and even ornaments hanging on them.  Even with anti-shake software, I am too shaky to take pictures of Christmas lights, so you'll have to take my word for it.

Santa comes to Yuma in a 4-wheel drive Jeep, he leaves Rudolph and the other reindeer up by the Grand Canyon where it's cooler.  There are no chimneys, no fireplaces either, it's just too warm, so I'm not sure how he gets in to leave the presents under the agave tree, but if you are good, he figures it out somehow.  

Have a Merry Christmas!


Thank you for reading this story, I hope you enjoyed it. This is just one of a hundred stories in my book, Parkinson's Humor - Funny Stories about My Life with Parkinson's Disease. Please consider purchasing a copy from Amazon.com or your favorite online book seller. Thank you and have a Happy Parkie Day!

Merry Christmas from a Parky

On the morning of Christmas, Santa gave to me

Twelve pills to take

Eleven aches and pains

Ten twitching fingers

Nine dropped cookies

Eight shirts I can't button

Seven trips to the bathroom

Six hours of sleep

Five cramping toes

Four hours of wiggles

Three stumbles and falls

Two cold feet

and I'm stiffer than the frozen snowman.

Here's my new Christmas song, Happy Parkie Christmas!

You can find all my videos on my YouTube channel:

https://www.youtube.com/user/ParkinsonsHumor

Thank you for reading this story, I hope you enjoyed it. This is just one of a hundred stories in my book, Parkinson's Humor - Funny Stories about My Life with Parkinson's Disease. Please consider purchasing a copy from Amazon.com or your favorite online book seller. Thank you and have a Happy Parkie Day!

Humor also runs in the family

Not only did my Dad have Parkinson's Disease, too, but he could be just as wacky as I am.  This is a photo of my Dad, jumping out of a present at an office Christmas Party.  I was about 10 at the time and Mom and I thought it was hilarious.  He had a very dry sense of humor and loved to embarrass and

Click on pic to enlarge, hit X in corner to return

tease me.  He would introduce me as his wife....or say I was his son George, both of which would elicit a piercing "Daaaadddd" from me, which would just make him laugh.  

When I complained about being called "Beverly Hillbillies" by the kids in school, my Dad would say "I wanted to name you Chrysanthemum, but I couldn't spell it and your Mom didn't like Marigold Petunia, so I wouldn't complain about Beverly,"

Giving me away......

Dad and Bev in 2002

Years later, when I married my Wonderful Husband and became step-mom to 2 kids almost my age, my Dad quickly figured out that if he would marry Lynn, my step-daughter,  then I would become his mother-in-law and he could be his own grandfather! 


PS She said NO.......


Thank you for reading this story, I hope you enjoyed it. This is just one of a hundred stories in my book, Parkinson's Humor - Funny Stories about My Life with Parkinson's Disease. Please consider purchasing a copy from Amazon.com or your favorite online book seller. Thank you and have a Happy Parkie Day!