Parkinson's Disease Humor, desert style

I have Parkinson's Disease and an unusual sense of humor, so I took some typical desert pictures and made them into Parkinson's Disease cartoons. Have a laugh or two. Clicking on a photo will enlarge it, then click the X in right corner to return to blog. :)

Done laughing?   Go check out the Parkinson's Humor page on Facebook!

My big Parkinson's Disease Humor Blog TV interview

Our local NBC affiliate in Yuma, Arizona did a story about my Parkinson's Humor blog and a lot of people have asked how to see it, so here it is.  I just set up my camera and taped my TV, so it's not perfect. Have a laugh and watch for the chat room comment "we're just a bunch of crazy parkies" in the background.  Describes me perfectly, I think.

You can find all my videos on my YouTube channel:

https://www.youtube.com/user/ParkinsonsHumor

PS now up to 6 continents, wow.......

Thank you for reading this story, I hope you enjoyed it. This is just one of a hundred stories in my book, Parkinson's Humor - Funny Stories about My Life with Parkinson's Disease. Please consider purchasing a copy from Amazon.com or your favorite online book seller. Thank you and have a Happy Parky Day!

Senior citizens .......... I love them!

Parkinson's Disease has a sense of humor and likes to sneak up on you if you aren't paying attention.  Sure, I noticed the tremors, but the rigidity or slowness, not so much. The first time I noticed how slowly I moved was on a cruise ship filled with seniors and I was completely shocked. My Wonderful Husband was taking the stairs two at a time and then I noticed that almost everyone was walking faster than me, even the folks with walkers and canes! 

Click to enlarge

The real kicker came when I went to visit my Aunt who lived by herself in an upstairs apartment. I hadn't seen her in years and yet, when my Wonderful Husband and I got to the door, she asked me if I could make it up the stairs. Somehow she knew that those 13 stairs would give me trouble. So there I was, 46-years old and being helped up the steps by a tiny and almost blind 94-year old  woman. We joked about it every phone call after that. She lived to be 97 and could still take those stairs better than I could.

I look healthy, and except for the Parkinson's, I am healthy and I can sometimes fool younger folks but I can't fool the older ones. If there is one thing I've learned in life, it is never under-estimate senior citizens. They watch over me and know instantly whether I am doing good or bad.

I used to live in a RV Park filled with seniors, and if they noticed that I was having trouble, they would come rescue me in a golf cart. Of course, they would never say they were rescuing me, they would come up with a good excuse to give me a ride home.  

The ladies were more creative:  "Hey I need your advice, can I give you a ride while we talk" or "Can you show me where Ann lives, she's near you, right?"  

But the men were more fun. They would say things like: "My wife isn't looking, can I give a ride to the prettiest girl in the park" or "Let's stir up some gossip, will you ride with me". These were extremely funny to me, since I knew their wives had sent them to get me, but I played along. I no longer live there and I miss all my friends and the golf cart rides.

click X to return to story

Now I live in a new housing community and I walk every morning with George, a neighbor of mine who is 78-years young.  Some days we walk for 45 minutes, some days we only do 10, it all depends on how we feel.  We watch the sunrise, check out the new construction and see how people have decorated their homes and yards. Sometimes, we even get to see a cactus blooming. But the best part of all is sharing stories and laughing!  What a great way to start the day!  

Beautiful metal wall decoration

 

Arizona Loch Ness Monster

Thank you for reading this story, I hope you enjoyed it. This is just one of a hundred stories in my book, Parkinson's Humor - Funny Stories about My Life with Parkinson's Disease. Please consider purchasing a copy from Amazon.com or your favorite online book seller. Thank you and have a Happy Parky Day!

A BIG DAY for my Parkinson's Disease Humor Blog

Well, today is a HUGE DAY for my little Parkinson's Disease Humor Blog! It is ONE month old and had it's 1000th reader, Andrew, a fellow Parkie from Australia whom I met in the Parkinson's Chat Room soon after I first logged in.  

I was awake very early one morning about 4 months ago (a common occurrence for us Parkies) and just wanted to talk to someone. I could have woke up my Wonderful Husband, but he looked sooo peaceful, sleeping soundly, that I just couldn't.

So, I Googled Parkinson's chat room, found one, logged in and hit the jackpot!  I wasn't alone! Also logged in was Mary L from Mississippi, Andrew from Australia and a lady from England. You see, when it's 4 am in Yuma, AZ, it's 6 am at Mary's, noon in England and 9 pm in Australia. 

We chatted about all kinds of things (some of it even related to Parkinson's), shared humorous stories and then Andrew showed us his pet snake, Pelorus, on the web cam. Now, most gals would have logged out, but I am a bit of a tomboy and I ain't scared of snakes. In fact, I even wrote a song about Andrew's snake for his birthday. One day, maybe someone who can actually sing, will record it! The bottom line, they all made me feel very welcome.

In the months since then, I have met many more Parkies from the USA and around the world. My Parky friends now outnumber all my other wonderful friends on Facebook! Another Aussie Parky, Karyn, is the one who inspired me to start this blog and she is writing one about getting DBS surgery.

I'd have to admit, when I wrote that first entry, at 4 am on a Sunday morning........I DID NOT THINK ANYONE would read it.......except my Wonderful Husband.  

Thanks everyone for proving me wrong!

Love always,
Yuma Bev  

Thank you for reading this story, I hope you enjoyed it. This is just one of a hundred stories in my book, Parkinson's Humor - Funny Stories about My Life with Parkinson's Disease. Please consider purchasing a copy from Amazon.com or your favorite online book seller. Thank you and have a Happy Parky Day!  

YumaBev, Thrift Store Queen, part 2

Click pic to enlarge, then X to go back

Several of my readers have inquired about the "decorating our gravel yard" comment in the previous Thrift Store Queen story, so I thought I should explain. I live in the desert. Water is scarce, and it's hot, so, mostly what we have is gravel for our yards, it's cleaner than just sand, but plain gravel is boring, so we get creative. We use rocks, different colored gravel, pots, ceramic figurines, and items scavenged from the desert (dead pieces of cactus, driftwood, animal skeletons) to liven things up and add a touch of humor. 

I was born in Florida, just steps away from the beach, and Florida is where I met and married my Wonderful Husband, but we now prefer living in the desert, it agrees with my Parkinson's disease.  However, that did not stop us from having our own Beach area. We created a water scene in our gravel yard, complete with lighthouse, water, sailing ship, flying fish and birds of all sorts in the "white rocks" beach. We even have a castle!  And our screened in porch area next to it is all decorated in beach theme as well, with water skis and an oar on the wall, a marlin, colorful beach theme banners and a tropical print rug.

As you can see, it's quite beach like. However, we have a real beach just 3 hours away in San Diego California. We went there yesterday to cool off, it was only 40 degrees cooler! While I was there I spotted this beach front $2 million home and noticed that they had "decorated" with all things nautical as well. The big difference between us..........I'm sure he paid big $$$ and I got most of mine at thrift stores for $1.  This Parky ain't stupid.



PS My friend Mary L, whom I know from the chat room, suggested I write a song called The Thrift Store Queen. So, of course, I did and here is the video of it. Just click the > to play it.

You can find all my videos on my YouTube channel:

https://www.youtube.com/user/ParkinsonsHumor

YumaBev is the Thrift Store Queen

Lineman costume

Thrift store T-shirt, don't wear if flying

 I love to go shopping at thrift stores. My friends call me the Thrift Store Queen. I look for costumes for my various music skits, t-shirts with humorous sayings and items to decorate our gravel yard. I rarely spend over $1 per item and often purchase nothing.

Thrift store items to decorate gravel yard

One day I saw something I could not resist. A sequin gown! Now, I need a sequin gown about as much as I need Parkinson's disease. I have no place to wear one, but I have always wanted one. Always. And this one was blue, the exact color I always wanted. So, I took it into the dressing room just to try it on. I could fantasize for a little while, couldn't I? I mean, what could it hurt?

It seemed the right size, but it had no zipper or buttons. So, I tried to put it on. I got my head and both arms through and promptly got stuck. Totally stuck. Completely stuck! It wouldn't come off or go on. I was stuck and all by myself, having left my Wonderful Husband at home. He normally comes with me if I am clothes shopping, but I had no plans to look at clothes this trip. 

We Parkies often have trouble taking clothes off over our heads, since that requires using muscles that are generally not flexed and they tend to disobey commands from the brain. Just like sometimes a Parky will plop down in a chair but have no difficulty getting back up.

So, here I was, a 49-year old woman with granny type sneakers on my feet, stuck in a dressing room with a sequin gown half on. I didn't know what to do! All the nearby voices seemed to be teenagers and I wasn't going to embarrass myself in front of a teen. So, I kept wriggling and got stuck worse.

Finally, I heard a familiar voice, a close friend, who is also a thrift store diva. I called out her name, and she found me and helped me get the gown off. We had a good laugh and I treated her to dessert nearby. Then she said "I bet you are supposed to step into that gown, not put it on over your head", so we went back and I tried it again. And it fit, perfectly, though I still needed help. So, I blew my budget and spent the $6 to buy it!

I took it to the best alterations place in town and asked the owner if she could put a zipper in it. She took a close look at it and said "No way, this is a custom gown, one mistake and the whole gown will unravel". Then she asked how much I paid, and I said six. She said "$6000, that's a great price", so I quickly left, smiling from ear to ear! 

A few months later, I treated my Wonderful Husband to a cruise. My Wonderful Husband and the Captain shared the same first name and both had relatives in the same town in Italy, so I got my picture taken with the two best looking men on the ship, wearing my blue sequin gown!  

Wonderful Husband, me, Captain

                
My Wonderful Husband says the gown really cost $606 ($6 for gown + $600 for cruise, so I could wear it). 




Thank you for reading this story, I hope you enjoyed it. This is just one of a hundred stories in my book, Parkinson's Humor - Funny Stories about My Life with Parkinson's Disease. Please consider purchasing a copy from Amazon.com or your favorite online book seller. Thank you and have a Happy Parky Day!

YumaBev has Parkinson's Disease and goes car shopping

I was having trouble getting out of our car due to Parkinson's Disease. Getting IN was fine, but getting OUT was becoming difficult and even though it was a luxury car, the seats were uncomfortable for me.  We had a second car, a convertible, but it was even harder for me to get out of.
 


So, I decided to go car looking.  I say looking because I was doubtful that I would find the right car for me.  We have all the big brands in our town and all the dealers are in a row.  I don't LOOK like there is anything wrong with me.  I have a small window every morning when I can move like a normal person.  Almost.

I started with the bigger SUV types, thinking that higher off the ground would be better.  They were easy to get OUT of, but not so easy to climb IN to.  I am short, barely 5 foot 2, and these are for tall Pappy Bears, not this little Goldilocks.  The salesmen kept asking what color I wanted and what options and were terribly confused when I would say, I just want one that fits me.


My Wonderful Husband said "lets look at the sporty models".  So I tried them, they looked sharp, but I needed the salesman's help to get out.  These cars are designed for middle age Guy Bears, not me. We had ruled out the sedans and I didn't want a Momma Bear mini-van.  I could only try a few each day, before I got too rigid.  I tried the smaller SUV types, but nothing fit.

YumaBev's boring white PT

I was just about to give up when I saw a PT Cruiser.  I gave it a try, and it FIT.  Perfectly.  It was easy to get in and out of and had an armrest that moved with the seat and I could reach the pedals without being up against the steering wheel.  So I bought one.  But my Wonderful Husband missed me riding in his convertible, so we found a PT Cruiser convertible and bought it, too.  Now I have my run errands car and can go riding with him in his, too.  

Wonderful Hubby's colorful PT

Goldilocks and her handsome prince Cruise happily ever after.

Thank you for reading this story, I hope you enjoyed it. This is just one of a hundred stories in my book, Parkinson's Humor - Funny Stories about My Life with Parkinson's Disease. Please consider purchasing a copy from Amazon.com or your favorite online book seller. Thank you and have a Happy Parky Day!

Rub a dub dub, YumaBev in a tub

Sometimes I forget what my limitations are due to Parkinson's Disease.  I did just that one day and the final result is this humorous story.  I was feeling kind of stiff and achy (a normal occurrence for me).  My Wonderful Husband had gone out Jeeping with the neighbors, so I had the whole house to myself.  

I was being lazy, watching TV, when a commercial came on showing a nice bubble bath.  Wow, I thought, that looks fantastic!  I bet a nice hot bath would feel really good.  Gee, I haven't taken a bubble bath in years and this new house I live in has a brand new tub in the guest bathroom that has never even been used.

So, I found something I could use as bubble bath and filled the tub.  I put on some soothing tunes and climbed in.  Ahhhh, it felt sooo good.  I could feel myself relaxing and all the stiffness melting away. It was absolutely wonderful.

Until the water cooled off and my skin began to take on that prune look.  I tried to get up and out of the tub.  Oops.  What have I done?  I could not get myself up.  There was nothing to grab a hold of to pull myself up.  The towel bar was too far away.  The sides of the tub were slick fiberglass.  There was a small grab bar but it was on my 'wrong' side and only about 10 inches above the tub. 

There I was, stuck in the tub.  The cell phone was out on the kitchen counter.  The neighbors on both sides were out somewhere in the desert with my Wonderful Husband.  HELP!

Since panic would only make things worse, I ran some more hot water, since I was now freezing.  I started wiggling and twisting around until I was facing the other direction.  Finally, after about another hour, I managed to get up on my good knee and grabbed the little bar with my good hand and used the water spigot with the other and managed to get myself up enough to climb out of the tub.

By then, I was exhausted.  So, I took a nap.  By the time my Wonderful Husband and the neighbors came home, I was fine and had turned my adventure into this humorous story to be shared over pizza, even joking about a group of handsome firemen coming to my rescue.  That's just me, find humor anywhere you can.

I did stop by the local firehouse just to check.  Nice fellows, but no movie stars, so haven't taken any more baths.

Thank you for reading this story, I hope you enjoyed it. This is just one of a hundred stories in my book, Parkinson's Humor - Funny Stories about My Life with Parkinson's Disease. Please consider purchasing a copy from Amazon.com or your favorite online book seller. Thank you and have a Happy Parky Day!